Monday, October 5, 2015

#ManProblemMonday: Put Up or Shut Up

In all the time I’ve been on the dating scene I’ve found there are three types of men when it comes to dating and money:

1. Those who spend
2. Those who don’t 
3. Those who mislead 

Now it seems like one would be better than the others, but that’s not always the case. Just because he spends doesn’t mean its ever on you. Some men will ask you to go dutch and turn around and ask when you what time are you serving breakfast in the same breath.  And sometimes the ones who don’t are the most thoughtful and creative in capturing you’re heart. But the one that gets under my skin is the worst of all 3… The men who lead and attempt to mislead with their money.

For example, the man in the Bentley and the penthouse who just won’t shut up about his career, nice things, and ivy league degree but doesn’t have a decent grasp of fine dining and is as un cultured as a privileged frat boy… (and not to mention horrible taste in fashion)

Or the man who’s designer head to toe, taking you on outings where he only requests the best of the best, only to come lay up in your house using up your air ( air is a valuable commodity in this Georgia heat ok) without even bringing dinner and gets mad if you ask him for $20.

And then there’s my least favorite: the one who throws money at your pockabook (what your granny calls a ladies purse ) hoping to get it to open up just for him. And I’m not talking about your Louis Vuitton Speedy. You know the typical guy (usually old or insecure and un attractive with a whole lot of ca$h) who tries to woo you with dollars. You meet him on Monday and by Friday he’s taken full inventory on your debt, hair and nail schedule, due dates on bills. And he wants to PAY THEM ALL and spoil you! So you express that that you’re not looking to be bought and he claims thats not what he’s looking to do. Preying on the idea that this is new for you and you’re not really used to this (but you’ve don this song and dance before). Now I may be country, but that don’t mean I fell off the turnip truck on the way to the big city! 

We all know you can’t get something for nothing and just like with credit you will eventually have to make a payment… with interest. And interest to me is lowered standards and crushed morals! And we all have to decide is “Is it really worth it?” For me the answer is NO. But for most of the women before you it probably was yes which explains why after he’s spent thousands of dollars paying for her 36 inch weave and dropping 10 stacks for the down payment on her new Mustang, she’s suddenly in love with the club promoter in the Ferreagamo belt who doesn’t even have a car.

But yet, he still hasn’t quite connected the dots and after a month or so of spending on you with no return, he’s confused, frustrated, and ready to cut you off. Well let him! I know you probably wanted to get one more bill paid but its better to leave with some business supplies and a new weave than to bob and weave when he’s trying to kiss you in the mouth! Now I don’t claim to have ever been rich or seen a whole lot of money but there have been times in my life where I’ve had everything that Ive ever wanted and times where I struggled, but I’ve been blessed to be able to say theres never been a point where Ive had absolutely nothing. My Granny always says “You cant miss what you never had” So I always strive to maintain a life within my means. When you do that, no one can ever pull the rug from under you and leave you on your ass desperate for the next come up.

So have you experienced a situation like this? Let me  know in the comments or join me on Periscope tonight and let’s chat!


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